I used the corrected structure for the narrative writing but I need to work on putting in some similes,metaphors and personification
The collapsing cave.
Kate glanced across at Jessica and noticed that she was nervous too. The guides had checked everyone’s equipment thoroughly and now the group was about to abseil down a sheer rock face into the eerie, unknown depths of a cave.
When it was Kate and Jessica’s turn to go abseil down the sheer rocks,they were both holding on to each other.Until SNAP!!! both of their cables broke they both fell down screaming for their lives.But then the guides caught them from below.
After that,they were both too scared to move,they were paralysed. So the rest of the group walked on,while Kate and Jessica were recovering.Then they felt better and started walking and then they caught up to the rest of the group.
Everything was fine until they were leaving the cave.The cave was collapsing,and they were all running,soon after that they all made it out of the cave safely.
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